In DRUG REHABILITATION / Tags: addiction, Alcoholism, children, explain, young /
Question by DeliCinq: How to explain addiction and alcoholism to young children?
I would appreciate the insight and experiences of families who have been touched by substance dependency and have had to explain it to young, developing minds.
We’ve had this conversation in the past with our children, whose biological mother who is also my relative, has struggled with addiction since her late teens. However, as a series of new situations come our way, the children are pressuring for more information about their mother’s condition.
I feel a little lost and I cannot get a hold of written information at the moment. My husband and I mostly answer from the heart. We do not judge or demonize any drug addicts and much less the mother of our children. However, it is hard to talk about the consequences of drugs and alcohol in excess to small children. Have you had to do something similar? How did it work? What resources, words, ideas did you use? And how do you think your children understood the message?
Ben: what truth? Our children know who their first mother is and what her problems are. However, we haven’t found the right words and strategy to satisfy them. They keep asking questions, the same questions and we wonder if we’re being clear or honest enough. We’ll answer the questions as many times they like but we want to make sure we’re doing it right.
Best answer:
Answer by tod m
a sickness they can’t fix.
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Well if thats you stance on it why not share your truth with them, kids are not stupid.
Alanon, the support organization for the families of alcoholic and drug addicts, has support information for kids. Here is their message board with additional info on publications that may be helpful: http://www.activeboard.com/forum.spark?forumID=42727&p=3&topicID=21740514
And here is the main website for Alanon: http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/ You’ll be able to find help and support through them.
All the best.
Addiction takes over your life. To be addicted, most of the time you’re craving, for a short time you’re high.
People turn to drugs because they’re unhappy with their lives. If hour son/daughter is happy, they won’t turn to drugs. People get tired of working 6 days a week year after year, they’re tired of their financial problems, tired of problems within relationships, tired with the family, tired with GFs/BFs, tired of not having your desires and dreams fulfilled.
Alcoholism is horrible. Just because it’s legal that doesn’t make it healthier than any illegal drug.
If they choose to do drugs, do them safely and DON’T get caught. People think they know what’s better for you so they created a law.
A year ago on 3-18-2010. My husband and the father of my 4 yo. Was killed by a drunk driver. I took her to a consular and to aa for children of victims meetings. I will tell you now that there are no words to explain their problem. But you need to re enforce that you love them and it is not their fault. That what the person has is a sickness. All you can do is keep answering their questions. Honestly. And as they grow older they will figure it out. There is no right or wrong way to answer their questions. Just make sure that they know they can come to you with anything they are not sure about. From reading your question I can tell you care a lot about these kids. And are doing a great job. Keep up the good work.
My father was an alcoholic and started doing weed when I was young. My best friend’s parents wouldn’t let her come over because there were beer cans all over the place. My dad beat my brother until he couldn’t move when he was drunk. I was around eleven. My dad has been brought home by the police several times. He would steal money from me for cigarettes, beer, and weed when I was younger.
I wish my mom had said something to me when I was five and dad got arrested for drunk driving. I didn’t understand what was happening and I needed her to talk to me and explain.
The best way to explain it to a child is gently. I would have told my daughter, “Dad got in trouble for drinking. He isn’t going to be home for a while. If you drink too much you might go to jail, too.”
Good luck. I’m sorry this has happened to your family.
Explain that addiction and alcoholism are illnesses – that some people get ill from a virus and some people get ill when a body part is not working right and some people get ill when they use certain substances like meth or alcohol.
This link might help you or simply google – explaining addiction to children