In ALCOHOLISM TREATMENT / Tags: alcholic, divorce, impact, Recovering, status, year /
Question by Mary D: What impact will my status as a recovering alcholic (1 year) have on a divorce?
My husband is verbally abusive and neglectful of me and my 3 girls (12, 12, 15). He agrees that we should not live together but is unwilling to get a divorce because he doesn’t want to pay child support. The environment at home has become so cold and angry that it is unhealthy for me and the children. I am in a masters program I will graduate from at the end of 2007 at which point I will be able to get a job in the school system. Until then I don’t have any way to support myself and the children. My husband makes about 0,000 a year. I contributed 50% of our income until late 2004 when my alcohol problems began to be addressed with rehab and therapy. Normally I would assume that I get custody of the girls and probably some sort of rehabilitative alimony until I get on my feet next year. However I worry about the damage my husband will try to do based on my alcholism history. As I said, I have been sober now for 15 months, spending all my time with my girls and in school.
Best answer:
Answer by sleepyhead544
Call DR Laura on Monday.
What do you think? Answer below!
5 ResponsesLeave a comment ?
Your alchol problems could have an impact on custody, however finacial support should not be a reason to stay with him. You can separate and petition for temporary spousal support. The alimony will depend on alot of factors but it appears as though it semms likely………
You assume you’ll get custody of the girls….I doubt it. You have a history of alcohol abuse. If he petitions for custody more than likely he’ll get it….and could possible have you receive supervised visitation with your children for a period of time. You are going to college. Why can’t you get a job as well? Rehabilitative alimony? Your husband has obviously been supporting your education financially as well as everything else. You have proved in the past that you are capable of earning as much as he does (50% of the income), but have elected not to now. You would be eligible for your portion of your marital share of property owned by both of you….depending on the laws of your state. You should look at things alot more realistically and consult an attorney.
You don’t hold any aces and you sound too calculating. You want him to pay for your recovery, alimony, schooling, and child support just because you are not happy. Based on his current income, he will be hit big to support you and can’t have the kids. I would be mad as hell too. I”d almost say that you don’t quite deserve it. If you are so good, just wait till you go out and make another living again.
It should not affect the outcome of your divorce. It was 15 months ago, you sought treatment and been sober for 15 months. If your husband thought your alcoholism was so detrimental to the well being of your kids, he should have left you 15 months ago. He will try to use it against you, though. Stay sober, stay invoved with your kids and don’t give him anything to use against you.
When you are ready to file for divorce, talk to an attorney BEFORE you tell your family, friends or husband. Your attorney can give you better strategy on retaining custody of your kids.
If you can, try to record your husband (secretly) during some of his verbal rampages and then store the tape somewhere he does not have access (like a close friend or family member you can trust). That can be used in court.
To know all about child custody and child custody help, go to this blog
http://usa-legalcare.blogspot.com/2007/05/child-custody-issues-click-here-for.html