2010-09-28
In ALCOHOLISM TREATMENT / Tags: achievers, Adult, Alcoholics, children, feel, need, over, overly, responsible /
Question by Deborah R: Why do adult children of alcoholic’s feel the need to be overly responsible, and over achievers?
Best answer:
Answer by TheJode29
Probably: Children of alcoholics see that their parents appear to have messed up their lives in some way, maybe if they aren’t being cared for properly due to their parents habit, so they’re determined not to make the same mistake as their parents…
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.. maybe because all their life their parents/guardians were the ones that needed to be cared for.. and the child ended up being the responsible one
it could also be that there parents/guardians never achieved what they could have in life.. and the adult now feels its his/her obligation to make things rights.. to make sure s/he never goes down that path
sad but true.. all this stress that the adult is now felling will probably make him more likely to turn to alcohol as a escape from his problems/the world!
because nothing ever satisfied the alcoholic parents and children would do – be- anything to please their parents – to feel loved and accepted. Kids think if they do everything right and take care of everything (even those things that the parents should be taking care of) then their parents will love them. – instead of love for love’s sake – instead of love just because they’re alive – it can suck and it can take a long time to realize that they are only responsible for themselves and they can’t fix the world they can’t be perfect they can’t make their parents happy cousinly the parents can do that
Alcoholics Anonymous is for the FAMILIES of alcoholics and not just for the alcoholics.
the bitter thing what they had through out their childhood , they carry those wounds till they achieve something great.they further travel & develop through the right track. this makes them more responsible. they have high degree of anxiety that the unwanted stamp of “DRUNKEN FATHER”S CHILD” which they carry always. This will be wiped out only when they prove to the world as achievers.