In DRUG REHABILITATION / Tags: about, Alcoholics, binge, care, don't, drinkers, hurting, people, they /
Question by Proudwifeof a policeofficer: Why don’t alcoholics and binge drinkers care about the people they are hurting?
Why do they just steam roll over their spouses, children, parents, friends, loved ones who care about them and want them to be healthy in order to get their greedy selfish fingers wrapped around a beer can or bottle?
Best answer:
Answer by Roger K
Addiction of any sort can do that. The need/desire for the substance totally over rules any common sense. Until they get to a point where they realize that themselves, no amount of logic, anger, threats or anything else will have much of an effect.
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It seemed like a good idea at the time….
because its a mental disease AKA addiction
I know..it’s horrible. My husband’s father is and has always been an alcoholic. Our kids cant go anywhere with him..he calls us drunk…its emabarrassing and VERY , VERY frustrating…not to mention..sad to think of all the damage he’s done and is still doing to his body.
Alcoholics, by whatever term you describe them, have a condition that dissociates them from everyone. No one is important, nothing matters to them. lifestyle choices are not important, seeing the future is impossible, telling you what you want to hear but not following through–all are typical behaviors, repeated ad infinitum.. Anyone on the “outside” sees the obvious missteps this person makes, and then tells the alcoholic. No matter. This is never heard. These are all signs of the addition this really is.
Your best choice is to put distance between you and that person. Both literally and figuratively. So don’t give excuses to the employer on the phone, etc.
Try Al Anon and get a sponsor to help you to deal with this. A very helpful organization.
I have an alcoholic in my family, who is also has bipolar disorder. Underlying mental illnesses can lead to alcohol abuse because people ‘self medicate’ to help themselves feel better. This becomes an addition, and they feel that they need more and more to keep themselves going. Alcoholism is something that sticks around for life, and there is no cure. Once the patient gets their addiction treated, they are known as recovering alcoholics and they can never drink again, or the addiction can return.
Many times an alcololic does not realize what they are doing to themselves and their family. They are caught in a downward spiral, and feel out of control. Some (including this member of my family) hit rock bottom and become homeless, or wind up in jail or prison. Sometimes that is what has to happen for someone to realize how their behavior impacts their and their families lives.
Alcololism is an illness, and requires treatment. However, the hardest part is admitting that there is a problem and actually seeking treatment. There is often other underlying mental illnesses, such as bipolar disorder, clinical depression, anxiety disorders, ect, which also need treatment. Alcoholism and the tendency to be addicted to alcohol and other substances tends to run in families.
It is a tough illness to beat, but it can be done. I know successful recovering alcoholics. Hopefully your family member can join an organization such as Alcoholics Anamous and get some help.
Good luck.